V8 Owner Regrets Spending More Time at Gas Station Than With Family
Admits not watching his kids grow up might not have been worth it. Maybe.
BAKERSFIELD—After years of daily fill-ups, late-night tows, and emergency “quick top-offs,” local car enthusiast and proud V8 owner Robert Gutierrez has expressed regret that he’s spent more time at gas stations than with his own family.
“I regret owning it, well, I do and I don’t,” said Gutierrez, oddly caressing the hood of his E92 M3 like it was the only child he liked. “But sometimes I wonder what my kids’ voices sound like now. Last time I saw them, premium unleaded was under four bucks.”
According to his wife, it wasn’t an issue in the beginning. “At first it was just a few extra minutes after work,” said Maria Gutierrez. “Then he started just going to Shells ‘for better fuel quality.’ Then every time I called him, he was at pump seven.”
Neighbors report seeing Gutierrez at the Shell down the street “pretty much every day,” sometimes twice. “He says he’s just topping off,” said eyewitness Daniel Cruz. “But that man’s been topping off since 2009. At this point, he should just cap out at the gas station.”
Gutierrez remains unsure if the sacrifices weren’t necessary. “You don’t understand,” he said. “That sound when it hits 8,000 RPM? That’s worth everything. All the missed recitals? They’ll be fineeee.”
Recent events, however, have made him rethink his priorities. “I saw my daughter post her graduation photo online,” he confessed. “I didn’t even know she was graduating.”
Gutierrez has since promised to start spending more time at home, right after he fills up since he’s already down to a quarter tank.