Shaved and Tucked Culture Has Gone Too Far

Local enthusiast reveals flawless engine bay because the engine was tucked.

LONG BEACH—The shaved and tucked scene reached new extreme levels this weekend when local enthusiast Daniel Cortez unveiled his Honda Civic with what onlookers described as “the cleanest bay ever seen.” That is, an engine bay so clean there is no engine in it.

“Look how smooth that is,” Cortez said proudly, gesturing toward an empty space where a motor once lived. “No wires, no hoses, no brackets, no clutter—literally nothing. Just perfection.”

According to Cortez, the entire powertrain has been relocated. “People are obsessed with hiding their brake lines and tucking their harnesses. What I don’t understand is why they would stop there when you can tuck the whole motor?”

Reactions at the meet were mixed. “I mean, it’s beautiful,” admitted fellow enthusiast Jorge Alvarez. “But can the car actually move on its own? I had to help him push it into the lot. It’s basically a SEMA car at this point.”

Critics were less kind. “This is insanity,” said local mechanic Sandra Flores. “The car is an engineering nightmare now, and the trunk is a disaster. If you want a frunk, just buy a Porsche.”

Still, many in the scene applauded Cortez’s commitment. “Real enthusiasts know it’s not about driving,” said attendee Marco Jiménez. “It’s about staring at your bay for six hours, then posting 37 pictures on Instagram. He’s a pioneer.”

Cortez remains unfazed by the backlash. “Does it run? Who cares. Nobody asks that when they see the Mona Lisa. They just admire it.”

Insiders say Cortez is already planning his next step: tucking the motor so well it is not even on the car.