Man Adds His Work Commute to Assetto Corsa in Hopes to Beat His Neighbor to the Street Parking Spot

Man says he just needs “one clean run” to finally secure curbside position

CHICAGO—In the highly competitive world of limited street parking, one man has taken a “data-driven approach” to securing the spot directly in front of his apartment.

Fed up with losing the same parking space to his neighbor, whom he refers to as “the guy with the shitbox,” local resident John Anderson has recreated his entire work commute inside the racing simulator Assetto Corsa in an effort to optimize his real-world commute home.

“I was tired of guessing,” Anderson said, gesturing toward a triple-monitor sim rig that is the only furniture in his living room. “Now I know exactly where I’m losing time. That left turn by the grocery store? I was braking way too early. That’s at least two car lengths gone.”

Using GPS data, traffic patterns, and what he claims is “a realistic approximation of idiots who always hesitate at green lights,” Anderson has spent the past three weeks refining his commute, logging over 47 hours of practice laps.

“I’ve already shaved 6.3 seconds off my average run,” he said. “If I nail the final sector and don’t get stuck behind a CyberTruck, that spot is mine.”

The setup includes a full racing seat, load cell pedals, and a detailed recreation of his neighborhood, complete with poorly timed traffic lights and “neighbors walking their dogs and waving.”

His neighbor, Sarah Mitchell, remains unimpressed.

“He’s taking this way too seriously,” Mitchell said. “It’s a parking spot. Sometimes I get it, sometimes he gets it. That’s just how it works.”

She said that with a grin because Mitchell had gotten it every day that week.

Anderson, however, insists progress is being made.

“I just need one clean run,” he said. “No traffic, no hesitation, perfect execution. I know it’s possible.”

Sources confirm Anderson has recently begun experimenting with alternative strategies, including leaving work three minutes early and adjusting his line through residential streets.

Residents say the rivalry has escalated in recent days, with both parties now outfitting aero and turbos on their vehicles.

For Anderson, the goal remains simple.

“I’m not asking for much,” he said. “Just a fair shot, optimal conditions, and complete control over the parking spot in front of my house.”