Ford Says “Why Stop There?” Teases 10-Door Mustang Following Positive Reception of 4-Door
A 4-Door Fits Your Family, but a 10-Door Lets Your Whole Party Destroy Curbs
DETROIT—Ford’s announcement of a 4-door Mustang has been met with great reception from people that don’t know coupes are cooler, and in the process, financial analysts have concluded that more doors equals more dollars. This is how the 10-door Mustang was born, and Ford is diving head first into the deep end by making GT and Dark Horse variants available.
“We announced the 4-door after our CEO was trying to be funny by putting our cars through AI image services and sending them in Teams messages,” said an overworked and underpaid engineer. “I didn’t want to have to go through the trouble of developing the stupid thing before people shit on it, so we leaked the news with the image. We had no idea people would want it. Like, why? I don’t have time for this.”
Ford quickly realized they might be sitting on a gold mine. The financial team was quick to seek to capitalize on the buzz. “We added two doors, and they kept telling us to shut up and take their money, so logically that means if we add eight more doors, they will throw even more money at us! It makes complete sense.”
The Mustang has outlived the Camaro and continues to humiliate it by selling EV versions that don’t look like it and now achieving more success by just adding more doors. Maybe it has to do with Camaros being the official cars of takeovers while Mustangs are completely harmless unless you’re a curb. The Mustang has survived countless bad decisions and has now demonstrated it is even immune to mutating doors.
The day we lose the Mustang will be a dark day in automotive history, but with this release, Ford has assured that day won’t come in our lifetime. How could it? The Mustang continues to enter new markets, and from the looks of it, the party bus market is in trouble.