Data Doesn’t Lie: Drivers Still Prefer Clapped-Out Golden Era Hondas
New survey reveals that despite 30 years, 12 owners, and two rusted fenders, the dream is still VTEC.
LONG BEACH—A new nationwide study has confirmed that drivers still crave golden era Hondas, even the clapped-out ones that smell faintly of fuel and vape smoke.
According to researchers, the average enthusiast would rather own a rusted 1998 Civic with three mismatched panels than a brand-new car with functioning air conditioning. “People talk about reliability,” said lead analyst Marco Herrera. “But what they really mean is the reliable comfort of knowing that no matter how bad life gets, your Honda will always be willing to supply VTEC.”
The study found that most respondents cited “not being able to have one in high school” as the main reason for their obsession. The psychological term for this, researchers noted, is “growing up broke,” a condition where you dream of having a cool car but never had enough money to buy one.
“I couldn’t afford one back then,” said participant Javier Ortiz, proudly revving his B20-swapped Civic in a boba shop parking lot. “Now that I can, they’re clapped out, but I still bought one.”
For many, it’s not about performance but about being brainwashed by nostalgia: the sound of VTEC, the Buddy Club body kit, and the feeling of danger every time you remember you’re basically driving a tin can. “Driving a ’90s Honda is the pinnacle of driving,” said Honda owner Carla Mendoza. “The only real option is a Golden Era Honda. Everything else can’t even compare.”
Honda representatives responded to the findings with caution. “We appreciate the passion,” said spokesperson Kelly Nguyen, “but we don’t get it. Our modern cars offer comfort, safety, Bluetooth.” She hesitated, then added, “Sorry, I lied. I have one too. It’s a ’96 Civic.”
As new cars become quieter, smarter, and more forgettable, the clapped-out Civics, Integras, and Preludes of the past remain alive: on jack stands, barely surviving the road, but alive nonetheless.