AIM to Release Budget Lap Timer So You Don't Have to Spend Hundreds to Find Out You're Slow

New Entry-Level Device Delivers Identical Humiliation at a Fraction of the Cost

LAKE ELSINORE—Motorsports electronics manufacturer AIM has announced a new budget-friendly lap timer aimed at making disappointment more accessible to drivers of all income levels.

The company says the affordable device was developed after years of customer feedback revealed that many track-day enthusiasts simply couldn’t justify spending hundreds of dollars to learn it’s not the traffic, tires, or alignment that’s causing them to lose thirty-five seconds per lap to a Honda Fit in their new Porsche.

“We believe devastating personal revelations about lack of skill should be available to everyone,” said AIM spokesperson Marco Bellini during the product launch. “Previously, drivers had to invest significant money to receive detailed confirmation that they’re absolute garbage. Now they can get that same information for cheap.”